Dear Christina, I have a boss that is stifling my career. I need to move past him. It has gotten to a ridiculous point. He controls my pay, promotions, etc. I believe he feels threatened by my education and experience. -Clay Dear Clay, Thank you for writing in. I’m sorry to hear that you feel like your boss is stifling your career. I know there are many people who … [Read more...] about What to Do When Your Boss is Blocking Your Career Growth
Personal Growth Articles
How do I know if my feelings are rational or irrational?
Dear Christina, I've heard you talk before about how our feelings can either be rational or irrational and the way you describe it makes so much sense. I've never heard someone describe it like you do. Can you describe it again so that I can really get it? It was so helpful to me the first time I heard you say it. -Justin Dear Justin, Hi! Thanks for writing in. I … [Read more...] about How do I know if my feelings are rational or irrational?
Why Do People Hurt Me So Much?
Dear Christina, Why do people hurt me so much? -Kelsea Dear Kelsea, Thank you for writing in and thank you for asking such a beautiful and vulnerable question. The short answer is this: People do things that hurt you because you have a wound within you that gets triggered when someone says/does a certain thing. The good news is that if you are feeling the wound, … [Read more...] about Why Do People Hurt Me So Much?
How Can My Pain be Purposeful?
Would you believe me if I told you that your pain was purposeful? That there is a reason you feel emotional pain and that reason can lead you to a more purpose-filled and powerful way of being? Many years ago, I would have thought that was BS. Many years ago, I would have said that the only reason I was feeling pain was because [blank] and [blank] and [blank] were doing … [Read more...] about How Can My Pain be Purposeful?
Your Feelings Don’t Have to Make Sense
Have you ever shamed yourself for feeling what you feel? Have you ever talked down to yourself and wished you felt different than you do? So often when I am working with someone, they shame themselves for their feelings or they belittle themselves for being “so stupid” to get hurt or angry or worked up over [blank] or [blank] or [blank]. And I have to lovingly remind them … [Read more...] about Your Feelings Don’t Have to Make Sense
How to Clear Old Pain
Did you know that almost every emotional reaction you have is a result of some past experience, some past painful moment, that is being expressed in the present? And that it's possible to clear the old pain so that you can live more happily in the present moment? Sounds bizarre, I know. But, perhaps a personal story from something that just happened to me will help me to … [Read more...] about How to Clear Old Pain
My life isn’t the way I want it to be. How do I stop being so angry at everyone and everything?
Dear Christina, This is going to be hard to convey in one entry. I'm 33 and recently moved out of living with ex-fiancé. I have done weekly therapy for 9 months and tried really hard to learn healthy/respectful/productive ways to argue, and no progress was made. We were together for 4 years. I'd been trying to get pregnant for the last 9 months without any success, which now … [Read more...] about My life isn’t the way I want it to be. How do I stop being so angry at everyone and everything?
Help! Why can’t I push past the barriers that are in my mind?
Dear Christina, Why can’t I push past the barriers in my mind, whether they originated from me or others? I used to think that I couldn’t push past my limits, didn’t find a reason to, or just didn’t try to until recently where I’ve made the effort to change my mindset and how I view myself. I want to be able to move on and move forward. But it seems to me that I can’t … [Read more...] about Help! Why can’t I push past the barriers that are in my mind?
I have dreams for my life, but I fear success.
Dear Christina, I was doing some reflecting, and it came to my attention that in a way I fear success. Mainly because I’ve never really accomplished anything yet (nothing really to brag about). I was thinking to myself about how much I’d make if I’d do my first real estate deal. Even on the low side, I’m looking to make a five-figure profit. That would be the most amount of … [Read more...] about I have dreams for my life, but I fear success.
Why Your Mindset Matters
Have you ever thought about how much your mindset matters in relationship to how it feels to live your life? Most people don't. Most people just feel what they feel and they think everyone else is responsible for it. I used to, too. But, I've learned, there's another way to be; one that's freeing. I used to think that everyone else was responsible for how I felt in any given … [Read more...] about Why Your Mindset Matters
Why We Should Love the People We Hate
Have you ever wondered if it's possible to love someone you hate? I mean, why the hell would anyone want to do that?! Well, read on. There's a really important reason why. Loving someone you hate. It's probably one of the most difficult concepts to grasp. And probably one that seems illogical. Why on earth would someone want to love a person they hate? And what does "loving … [Read more...] about Why We Should Love the People We Hate
Longing for An Ex Even After You Breakup
Have you ever longed for an ex after a breakup? Have you ever continued to love them long after they left your life? If so, listen up. I am often asked “how do I stop loving my ex?” And the number one thing I say to people is stop trying to stop. The continued love serves a purpose, and it’s an important one. Now, before I get started, I'll warn you: This post has some … [Read more...] about Longing for An Ex Even After You Breakup
An Important Part of Finding the Perfect Mate
Did you know that oftentimes we find ourselves in relationships and situations that don't feel good simply because we never took the time to really consider what would feel good? Think about that. When's the last time that you sat down and envisioned what your perfect job would look like and feel like? When's the last time you sat down and wrote out all the qualities you … [Read more...] about An Important Part of Finding the Perfect Mate