Dear Christina, I just want clarity on my relationship because I'm having trouble being vulnerable in my connection. I feel like there's a disconnect every time things don’t go a certain way and I'm working on not taking things so personally, even though he’s my first real connection. - Simone Dear Simone, Thank you for writing in and thank you for asking for … [Read more...] about Why do I feel disconnected from my partner every time there’s conflict?
Pain & Triggers
Dear Christina, I've heard you talk before about how our feelings can either be rational or irrational and the way you describe it makes so much sense. I've never heard someone describe it like you do. Can you describe it again so that I can really get it? It was so helpful to me the first time I heard you say it. -Justin Dear Justin, Hi! Thanks for writing in. I … [Read more...] about How do I know if my feelings are rational or irrational?
Dear Christina, Why do people hurt me so much? -Kelsea Dear Kelsea, Thank you for writing in and thank you for asking such a beautiful and vulnerable question. The short answer is this: People do things that hurt you because you have a wound within you that gets triggered when someone says/does a certain thing. The good news is that if you are feeling the wound, … [Read more...] about Why Do People Hurt Me So Much?
Dear Christina, Why do some people have so much negative energy? -Josh Dear Josh, Thank you for writing in! There are a lot of reasons a person might have a lot of negative energy. But, at the core of nearly every reason is because they likely also carry a lot of emotional pain and/or carry a lot of other people’s pain, and don’t know how to clear any of … [Read more...] about Why Do Some People Have Such Negative Energy?
Dear Christina, What creates negative energy in us? -Shannon Dear Shannon, Thanks for writing in and asking such a simple but powerful question! I've broken my response down into sections because there's a lot here. Actually, there's far more that I'd like to communicate, however, there's only so much I can fit into a single blog post. So I've tried to keep it … [Read more...] about What Creates Negative Energy in Us?
Would you believe me if I told you that your pain was purposeful? That there is a reason you feel emotional pain and that reason can lead you to a more purpose-filled and powerful way of being? Many years ago, I would have thought that was BS. Many years ago, I would have said that the only reason I was feeling pain was because [blank] and [blank] and [blank] were doing … [Read more...] about How Can My Pain be Purposeful?
Have you ever shamed yourself for feeling what you feel? Have you ever talked down to yourself and wished you felt different than you do? So often when I am working with someone, they shame themselves for their feelings or they belittle themselves for being “so stupid” to get hurt or angry or worked up over [blank] or [blank] or [blank]. And I have to lovingly remind them … [Read more...] about Your Feelings Don’t Have to Make Sense
Did you know that almost every emotional reaction you have is a result of some past experience, some past painful moment, that is being expressed in the present? And that it's possible to clear the old pain so that you can live more happily in the present moment? Sounds bizarre, I know. But, perhaps a personal story from something that just happened to me will help me to … [Read more...] about How to Clear Old Pain
Dear Christina, This is going to be hard to convey in one entry. I'm 33 and recently moved out of living with ex-fiancé. I have done weekly therapy for 9 months and tried really hard to learn healthy/respectful/productive ways to argue, and no progress was made. We were together for 4 years. I'd been trying to get pregnant for the last 9 months without any success, which now … [Read more...] about My life isn’t the way I want it to be. How do I stop being so angry at everyone and everything?
Dear Christina, Why can’t I push past the barriers in my mind, whether they originated from me or others? I used to think that I couldn’t push past my limits, didn’t find a reason to, or just didn’t try to until recently where I’ve made the effort to change my mindset and how I view myself. I want to be able to move on and move forward. But it seems to me that I can’t … [Read more...] about Help! Why can’t I push past the barriers that are in my mind?
Dear Christina, I keep sabotaging my health...overeating and drinking the last four years after not drinking for 20 years. Please help. ~Tami Dear Tami, Thank you for writing in. In your submission, you didn’t include information about what might be going on in your life that’s causing you to change your patterns and begin sabotaging your health, so I am limited … [Read more...] about Help! Why do I keep sabotaging my health with overeating and drinking?
Dear Christina, Thank you for the last video you made about my mom. After listening to it I realized that I still have some resentment towards her and my family for their lack of belief in me and for misjudging me and making me feel like I had to always show up in a certain way to get their love and attention. I find it hard for me to forgive them. I still feel the pain … [Read more...] about How do I forgive my mom and my family for the pain they caused me?
Dear Christina, This weekend I went out to eat with my mom and aunt. And it was interesting for me to see the situation my mom is in. For basically all my life, she had been pushing me to become a nurse because "I'll always have a job", she would say. But to this day she is looking for a new job, on unemployment, and never looking to retire. -Anonymous Dear … [Read more...] about How do I handle my mom’s dreams for my life?
Dear Christina, I was doing some reflecting, and it came to my attention that in a way I fear success. Mainly because I’ve never really accomplished anything yet (nothing really to brag about). I was thinking to myself about how much I’d make if I’d do my first real estate deal. Even on the low side, I’m looking to make a five-figure profit. That would be the most amount of … [Read more...] about I have dreams for my life, but I fear success.
Dear Christina, How do I still love the people who do things I hate? I have a brother-in-law who does things that I absolutely hate. He is always being negative and mean to my sister and he treats her poorly. And I just can’t help but hate him for it. I don’t want to hate him, but I do. Please help me. -Janice Dear Janice, Thank you for writing in. :) You’re … [Read more...] about Help! How Do I Still Love the People Who Do Things I Hate?